The Official Cricket Thread

[TedMaul]

Series win?

[Gumboot]

Series win?

Oops, I should've said "for retaining the Ashes".

[Grandpa]

Series win?

Oops, I should've said "for retaining the Ashes".

And dominating the last 3 tests

It was a great series. Imagine if that England side pre-Bazball had shown up... would have been carnage..

[Guy Smiley]

I didn't watch any of this series... followed online.

I'm now prepared to admit that Bazball is a Thing. Excellent series, shame about the weather affected results.

[TedMaul]

The final session was nothing short of scintillating when you think of the series culmination and the back story with some of the players. There’s going to be a lot of bail swapping in junior matches

[Biffer]

The final session was nothing short of scintillating when you think of the series culmination and the back story with some of the players. There’s going to be a lot of bail swapping in junior matches

Broad was quite funny getting interviewed about that, Agnew asked where it came from, he said he just made it up last week, couldn't believe it worked, and wished he started it ten years ago.

[TedMaul]

There was also some lovely schadenfreude for the thread’s cheap sex toy Deepsouth who spent weeks crowing particularly about Englands cheating , Broad being shit and Bairstow being shitter. Final ball Broad throws down an absolute pearl ; edge from your man Carey, Bairstow takes him.
Cue the inevitable dive into a hole from Bigboy Barry.

[Biffer]

There was also some lovely schadenfreude for the thread’s cheap sex toy Deepsouth who spent weeks crowing particularly about Englands cheating , Broad being shit and Bairstow being shitter. Final ball Broad throws down an absolute pearl ; edge from your man Carey, Bairstow takes him.
Cue the inevitable dive into a hole from Bigboy Barry.

He disappeared when England started taking wickets and hasn't come back.

[JM2K6]

The final session was nothing short of scintillating when you think of the series culmination and the back story with some of the players. There’s going to be a lot of bail swapping in junior matches

Broad was quite funny getting interviewed about that, Agnew asked where it came from, he said he just made it up last week, couldn't believe it worked, and wished he started it ten years ago.

Not quite - he said it was something Aussies did for luck, suggested Justin Langer had done it, then asked Steve Smith and said maybe he'd made it up instead.

The reason why this was extra-specially funny is because he was deliberately referring to the time that Langer knocked the bails off and the Aussies appealed for hit wicket...



Broad never misses. This is an all-time great interview, when Broad volunteered to do the presser when England were getting absolutely annihilated in NZ off the back of a dreadful Ashes tour and the whole sandpapergate thing had just kicked off:





Honestly I hope he remains this funny and relevant on our screens when it comes to cricket for a long time.

[TedMaul]

Sadly DS will be back. There’s only so much cry-wanking you can do in a shed by a shit beach.

[Thor Sedan]

Is deepsouth real?

It feels like 2010 trolling energy but a little bit sadder?

[TedMaul]

He makes Ali’s Choice look like Christopher Hitchens.

[Punter15]

Is deepsouth real?

It feels like 2010 trolling energy but a little bit sadder?

Is he Deepsouth like Hobart deep south, or Deepsouth like ‘we may be divorced but you’ll always be my sister’ deep south?

[Gumboot]

I wonder why he named himself after a Kiwi ice cream company.

[TedMaul]

Doesn’t matter. He’s the Clarence Beeks to the Board’s Gorilla.





And he loves it.

[Grandpa]

The final session was nothing short of scintillating when you think of the series culmination and the back story with some of the players. There’s going to be a lot of bail swapping in junior matches

Broad was quite funny getting interviewed about that, Agnew asked where it came from, he said he just made it up last week, couldn't believe it worked, and wished he started it ten years ago.

Not quite - he said it was something Aussies did for luck, suggested Justin Langer had done it, then asked Steve Smith and said maybe he'd made it up instead.

The reason why this was extra-specially funny is because he was deliberately referring to the time that Langer knocked the bails off and the Aussies appealed for hit wicket...



Broad never misses. This is an all-time great interview, when Broad volunteered to do the presser when England were getting absolutely annihilated in NZ off the back of a dreadful Ashes tour and the whole sandpapergate thing had just kicked off:





Honestly I hope he remains this funny and relevant on our screens when it comes to cricket for a long time.

Two things... Langer, you sneaky bugger...

And Broad... "Why would you change a method that's working?"

[Paddington Bear]

I didn't watch any of this series... followed online.

I'm now prepared to admit that Bazball is a Thing. Excellent series, shame about the weather affected results.

We saw as the series went on how it can be refined to beat quality opposition who aren't awed by the hype. I'm a little surprised more sides haven't adopted the batting mentality yet - I was there on Friday and watching Labuschagne was just inexplicable given the environment England produce now.

[TedMaul]

He was duped and mesmerised at the same time.

[Margin__Walker]

First time I've seen that Langer clip. WTAF

I know it's a personal thing and there's a huge family impact to continuing for him, but it's a real shame to see Broad retire. Absolutely had another year at the top in him. Will make a great pundit though.

[Biffer]

First time I've seen that Langer clip. WTAF

I know it's a personal thing and there's a huge family impact to continuing for him, but it's a real shame to see Broad retire. Absolutely had another year at the top in him. Will make a great pundit though.

Probably had another couple tbh. The temptation would have been there to make the next Ashes series, but that's two and a half years - otherwise you're retiring after home series v SL and WI, which is a bit of a damp squib tbh. You can see the satisfaction of going after a home ashes.

[Big D]

Where Broad and Anderson differ I think is that Broad lives for the big moments and I don't think West Indies and Sri Lanka do it for him. Really at 37 he had no right bowling as well as he did this series.

Whereas I think Anderson is more level temperament and enjoys running in and bowling regardless of opposition.

[Sandstorm]

Where Broad and Anderson differ I think is that Broad lives for the big moments and I don't think West Indies and Sri Lanka do it for him. Really at 37 he had no right bowling as well as he did this series.

Whereas I think Anderson is more level temperament and enjoys running in and bowling regardless of opposition.

Broad will join Sky Sports as a pundit in the next 3- 6 months and he'll be bloody good at it. Hopefully they dump Kevin Petersen at the same time.

Jimmy has no personality and doesn't know what he'll do after cricket.

[Grandpa]

Where Broad and Anderson differ I think is that Broad lives for the big moments and I don't think West Indies and Sri Lanka do it for him. Really at 37 he had no right bowling as well as he did this series.

Whereas I think Anderson is more level temperament and enjoys running in and bowling regardless of opposition.

Broad will join Sky Sports as a pundit in the next 3- 6 months and he'll be bloody good at it. Hopefully they dump Kevin Petersen at the same time.

Jimmy has no personality and doesn't know what he'll do after cricket.

Broad has already started. Was covering a Hundred match the other night.. but was rained off...

[Deepsouth]

And yet the all conquering Bazball couldn't beat a weak Australian team on their own patch. Four series now isn't it

[Deepsouth]

Broad is an effete pansy isn't he.....

Had to learn his cricket in Melbourne grade didn't he lol......

[TedMaul]

The smacked about tool is getting all brave for Mummy.

[JM2K6]

And yet the all conquering Bazball couldn't beat a weak Australian team on their own patch. Four series now isn't it

They would have won the series if 2 days of rain hadn't saved Australia from an absolute thumping in the 4th Test. As it is, they beat Australia twice and drew one that they were absolutely dominating. A "weak" Australia that are the world test champions and contained several of the best players in the world. The next time Australia comes over here for an Ashes series, several members of the squad won't have been born since the last time Australia won a series here. That's humiliating. England have at least won a series in Australia in living memory. Tim Bresnan has won more overseas Ashes series than Steve Smith, Pat Cummins, et al!

As for Broad - he spent a summer in Australia as a kid and walloped the locals with bat and ball. Doesn't look like he needed to learn much from them - and he's certainly been teaching them a lesson ever since. 153 wickets against Australia alone. 604 career wickets. 22 wickets in the series at 28, one behind Starc, but miles ahead of Hazlewood, Cummings, the absolutely shithouse Boland, etc etc. Cummins is rated one of the best in the world and managed 18 at nearly 40 a pop. Perhaps some of your bowlers could do with being a bit more "effete"?

Still, nice to see you again. Funny how your last appearance was you crowing about 3-1 only for you to suddenly disappear as soon as England started taking wickets. Weird! I can only assume you pissed your pants so badly that this is the first time you've managed to get back into the basement to use the PC without being overcome by the smell of your own terrified urine soaking everything. You really are one of the biggest cowards ever to grace an internet forum. Absolutely terrified

[Deepsouth]

You amuse me mate. You are quite good at massaging the truth. Spose that isn't hard in modern day England....

[JM2K6]

You amuse me mate. You are quite good at massaging the truth. Spose that isn't hard in modern day England....

You run away screaming whenever the truth is revealed to you, you massive baby.

[TedMaul]

Fuck me. What a busted flush this pansy is.

[Guy Smiley]

And yet the all conquering Bazball couldn't beat a weak Australian team on their own patch. Four series now isn't it

They would have won the series if 2 days of rain hadn't saved Australia from an absolute thumping in the 4th Test. As it is, they beat Australia twice and drew one that they were absolutely dominating. A "weak" Australia that are the world test champions and contained several of the best players in the world. The next time Australia comes over here for an Ashes series, several members of the squad won't have been born since the last time Australia won a series here. That's humiliating. England have at least won a series in Australia in living memory. Tim Bresnan has won more overseas Ashes series than Steve Smith, Pat Cummins, et al!

As for Broad - he spent a summer in Australia as a kid and walloped the locals with bat and ball. Doesn't look like he needed to learn much from them - and he's certainly been teaching them a lesson ever since. 153 wickets against Australia alone. 604 career wickets. 22 wickets in the series at 28, one behind Starc, but miles ahead of Hazlewood, Cummings, the absolutely shithouse Boland, etc etc. Cummins is rated one of the best in the world and managed 18 at nearly 40 a pop. Perhaps some of your bowlers could do with being a bit more "effete"?

Still, nice to see you again. Funny how your last appearance was you crowing about 3-1 only for you to suddenly disappear as soon as England started taking wickets. Weird! I can only assume you pissed your pants so badly that this is the first time you've managed to get back into the basement to use the PC without being overcome by the smell of your own terrified urine soaking everything. You really are one of the biggest cowards ever to grace an internet forum. Absolutely terrified

Gorgeous. Always good to see a highly strung Surrey Hills drag queen cop a decent slap down.

[TedMaul]

https://img.gifglobe.com/grabs/partridg ... x5zPv1.gif

[Biffer]

And yet the all conquering Bazball couldn't beat a weak Australian team on their own patch. Four series now isn't it

Yeah, the weak Australian team that won the world test championship the week before they played England.

I’d say it’s nice to have you back, but it’s not.

Prick

[Rhubarb & Custard]

And yet the all conquering Bazball couldn't beat a weak Australian team on their own patch. Four series now isn't it

Yeah, the weak Australian team that won the world test championship the week before they played England.

I’d say it’s nice to have you back, but it’s not.

Prick

They certainly weren't as strong as expected. Or at least I anticipated a lot more from Boland and Hazlewood, both looking so well suited to English conditions. How much it's just hard adjusting, how much it was the pressure of the Ashes and Bazball I don't know, but neither is suddenly a bad player, Hazelewood remains a key part of an outstanding seam attack. I was also expecting more from Smith and Labuschagne, it didn't really work for them either, though clearly they're also both quality players.

And then for all his figures don't look the best I don't imagine the England team have anything to say about Cummins as a bowler other than bloody hell he's good, and perhaps in some ways similar to Anderson things didn't work out this series

Both sides have things to be pleased with, both things to be frustrated with. Not my favourite series nor even favourite Ashes series, but it was a high quality one and showed why test cricket remains the pinnacle for so many.

Looking forward to the tour to India

[Sandstorm]

The Hundred. Can’t even show a runout attempt without a fcuking stupid triple split-screen that the 3rd umpire can’t use properly.

Fucking lame tournament. Puke.

[Deepsouth]

You amuse me mate. You are quite good at massaging the truth. Spose that isn't hard in modern day England....

You run away screaming whenever the truth is revealed to you, you massive baby.

Run away lol. Truth you say lol. The truth is you are a coward who hasn't served a day in his life but but is willing to pour shit on those who have. You are a parasitic cretin. Yeah you love England don't you, just not enough to put your precious life on the line for it. That's for others to do isn't it Jack.....

You keep telling your lies and bigging it up here on the internet Jack, meanwhile I might go for a kayak, maybe grab a few lobsters here in my 'shack in paradise'

xxzptbe465l46gua0eqp.jpg (445.58 KiB) Viewed 1990 times

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You enjoy your England though.

You so deserve it lol.......



.

[JM2K6]

The only thing you've served is undercooked shrimp, you absolute fantasist.

[Biffer]

Is the 14 year old about to pretend he’s served in the military?

[Deepsouth]

Is the 14 year old about to pretend he’s served in the military?

IMG_20230807_181005~2.jpg (544.41 KiB) Viewed 1945 times

[Insane_Homer]

LOL, I took a photo of my dad's card to win an argument on the internet

We'll need some top secret documents as 'real' proof