NPR

Sister thread to the get right on my wick one.....

I know there are things my missus does that drives me mad and there are precious few places you can get it off your chest, so maybe this can be a place where we can vent our frustrations.

My number one is the passive aggressive treatment of being obviously pissed off but when you ask her what is wrong you get the rebuttal of "I'm fine". Does my head in.

Second is (acknowledgement to Yeeb who brought this up the other day) her propensity to constantly fritter money away on unecessary purchases.

Her money sense more or less revolves around a belief that if she has money then it HAS to be spent. Now, this would not annoy me so much if not for the fact that I think that my teenage daughter seems to developing the same habit.

Leaves shoes all over the house. Everything else she’s very tidy…..but the fucking shoes!!!!

Oh, you lot at are in trouble…

Sal!!!!!

Bit of a cliché, but she's incapable of loading a dishwasher correctly.

Then confused as to why things aren't clean after she's pressed two bowls next to each other or forced something in that stopped the rotor arm spinning.



She's decent with money though tbf. Not tight, but doesn't fritter it away on useless stuff and is good with savings/investments.

The constant demands for creative occasionally illegal intercourse.


Oh, does. Thought it was doesn’t..

Par for the gender course so far.

One of mine, and that could apply to both is flat out making shit up in hindsight. "Oh, but you absolutely said you wanted (x that went horribly wrong) because of (y that we never, ever spoke about).

Has you on the back foot immediately because as the years go by and with advancing senility you can't remember 10mins ago, there's no cast iron certainty in your mind that this is 100% completely made up.

Dylan Moran had it right, they're simply smarter and more dynamic than us.

lemonhead wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 7:20 am. One of mine, and that could apply to both is flat out making shit up in hindsight. "Oh, but you absolutely said you wanted (x that went horribly wrong) because of (y that we never, ever spoke about).

Yes!

She gets comfy on the couch - I get comfy on the couch.

The kids come in and want numerous things done for them - drinks, food, things carried, taken upstairs....

Wife - 'Daddy will do that for you'.

But my biggest one is that I am not allowed to be sick without her being just a little more sick. If I wake up with a sore throat - her throat is twice as sore and has been sore for a couple of days. If I have an upset stomach - her stomach also feels bad. If I hurt my leg - her back is really painful. I don't think I have had a individual sick day for around 16 or 17 years.

But I love her....so what can you do??

Dropping stuff. Since we've known each other she's been through well over a dozen mobile phones while I've had two, and I only replaced the old one because it was struggling to keep up. Buy new glasses, guaranteed smashed within a couple of months. To be fair it might not be her fault, I'm sure she's got mild dyspraxia because she trips over far more than any grown woman should. She also occasionally gets left and right mixed up which is fun when she's driving.

Hugo wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 6:35 am My number one is the passive aggressive treatment of being obviously pissed off but when you ask her what is wrong you get the rebuttal of "I'm fine". Does my head in.

Hugo wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 6:39 am Second is (acknowledgement to Yeeb who brought this up the other day) her propensity to constantly fritter money away on unecessary purchases.

Her money sense more or less revolves around a belief that if she has money then it HAS to be spent. Now, this would not annoy me so much if not for the fact that I think that my teenage daughter seems to developing the same habit.

Are these not universal? Add the silent treatment to the first one though - both a blessing and drives me nuts at the same time!

Margin__Walker wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 7:17 am
She's decent with money though tbf. Not tight, but doesn't fritter it away on useless stuff and is good with savings/investments.

+1 (bit of positive support for Salanya )

Celebrated our 40th anniversary a couple of weeks ago and been together 45 years.
Can't think of too many things that have driven me up the wall over that time.
I guess that faffing around deciding what to wear when we are supposed to be on our way to the station, a taxi's waiting outside or I'm already in the car waiting and we're late is one
Not wanting to drive my (automatic) car because she doesn't think she'll get used to it but has only sat in the driver's seast once in the last 2 years to try nand learn is another
Otherwise I'm sure the boot is on the other foot and there many, many things I do that drive her mad

SaintK wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 9:44 am
Otherwise I'm sure the boot is on the other foot and there many, many things I do that drive her mad

She doesn't tell you every week????

Sandstorm wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 9:51 am

SaintK wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 9:44 am
Otherwise I'm sure the boot is on the other foot and there many, many things I do that drive her mad

She doesn't tell you every week????

Several of them every day

Breathe..

-General forgetfulness.
-Never locks the car door.
-lifts things around the house, then puts them somewhere and forgets where she put them
-never leaves the car keys in the bowl where we agreed to put keys. If i need to get something from her car, I need to check her 5 coats/jackets, or her 5+ bags, and in many cases, inside the car itself.
-Left her Mum to the airport yesterday, forgets to bring her purse so has to plead with the carpark attendant to let her out for free.
-Just doesn't do details at all. Once went to pick up her sister from the wrong airport because she didn't check which one she was flying into
-Leaves her phone at places we go to.
-cannot prioritise. She'll say to me that she has 3 things to do before a certain time, she'll start the least important, and most time consuming one first, get distracted by something completely new and irrelevant halfway through then by the time we need to go somewhere and the 3 things need to have been done, nothing will have been completed.

Tbf she is an amazing creature, incredible mum to our kids and smoking hot, so I can live with all of the above

While watching a movie / TV series will ask questions about the plot as if I've already seen it

Irons the collars on my work shirts all wrong, but there's no way in hell I'm saying anything about that

Doesn't understand why you should take meat out of the fridge and let it get to room temp before putting it in a pre-heating oven

When I'm cooking she will take knifes and other utensils and wash them while I'm still using them

Blames the yellow tint on the underside of toilet seat on my pee and not the yellow rim mounted thingees she puts there

While doing the weekly food shop, will WhatsApp me 2-3 time to ask if we need x or y, then forgets to get things that are on her shopping list, almost always one's I've put on the list.

Uses tinfoil instead of cling film when putting left overs in the fridge

Set the washing machine to start at exactly the same time as my morning shower

and the pièce de resistance, while having a well-earned nap on the couch, she'll tap me on the shoulder to wake me to tell me she's going out...

Jim Lahey wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 10:07 am -General forgetfulness.
-lifts things around the house, then puts them somewhere and forgets where she put them
-never leaves the car keys in the bowl where we agreed to put keys. If i need to get something from her car, I need to check her 5 coats/jackets, or her 5+ bags, and in many cases, inside the car itself.
-Leaves her phone at places we go to.

Haha! Can totally relate, my missus misplaces her stuff all the time. Comes in from the car, within 2 mins has no idea where her car keys are.

Lets me drive her Mini JCW to give it a decent run outside of 20/30/40 mph zones and then complains when I utilise all the BHP and handling capability fitted.

The ability to start random discussions during critical moments while I'm watching something on the tele. Usually, I can apply my just ignore her superpower, but alas whilst my abilities are reliable over short bursts, they are no match for her "did you hear me/what do you think" at increasingly louder and aggressive levels.

Insane_Homer wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 10:08 am While watching a movie / TV series will ask questions about the plot as if I've already seen it

Another one of the universal traits.

English isn't her first language, so I try to be understanding and patient, but she does it even when she's not watching with me - she'll walk into the room mid movie/tv show, ask a whole bunch of questions and then walk out again

This and the gets on my wick thread do seem to be moving considerably faster than a lot of threads on here

When I'm cooking she will take knifes and other utensils and wash them while I'm still using them

Amen. Any word of protest met with "Well, I'm clearing up". And just you try doing the same back to her.

The ability to start random discussions during critical moments while I'm watching something on the tele

With me, normally a bit more tactful. Waits until Munster/Ireland finally get into the 22 in search of their first score. General raised volume of the crowd and me going stone silent while gripping the edge of the couch is obviously a big green light.

lemonhead wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 11:22 am

When I'm cooking she will take knifes and other utensils and wash them while I'm still using them

Amen. Any word of protest met with "Well, I'm clearing up". And just you try doing the same back to her.

The ability to start random discussions during critical moments while I'm watching something on the tele

With me, normally a bit more tactful. Waits until Munster/Ireland finally get into the 22 in search of their first score. General raised volume of the crowd and me going stone silent while gripping the edge of the couch is obviously a big green light.

Equally as frustrating is her telling/teasing me to sit still every ten minutes while I'm watching a game of rugby. Even with my very best efforts I can't do it man, I have this inability to keep my fucking legs still or I'll start leaning in certain direction depending on what I see on tv. She finds it hilarious. Cow.

Falling asleep in front if the telly at 9.30, yet somehow being unable to sleep if I have the light on past 11.00, cough, or move in the bed.

Seriously, she could fall asleep during the opening sequence of Saving Private Ryan but is has some kind of super senses, hypertuned to the slightest stimulation as soon as she gets into bed.

I do flat out warn visitors I'll be poison in company if there's an important match on.

Often best we're in separate rooms as my leaping up with a four letter expression and hammering fists on the furniture does tend to annoy.

Hal Jordan wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 11:44 am Falling asleep in front if the telly at 9.30, yet somehow being unable to sleep if I have the light on past 11.00, cough, or move in the bed.

Seriously, she could fall asleep during the opening sequence of Saving Private Ryan but is has some kind of super senses, hypertuned to the slightest stimulation as soon as she gets into bed.

Hal Jordan wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 11:44 am Falling asleep in front if the telly at 9.30, yet somehow being unable to sleep if I have the light on past 11.00, cough, or move in the bed.

Seriously, she could fall asleep during the opening sequence of Saving Private Ryan but is has some kind of super senses, hypertuned to the slightest stimulation as soon as she gets into bed.

surely that's a positive?

Shouldn't this be "Stuff your missus does that doesn't drive you up the wall?"

Insane_Homer wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 10:08 am
Uses tinfoil instead of cling film when putting left overs in the fridge

This drives me nuts too.

Moving my stuff that has been left in places for a reason then denying having moved it when I can't find it.

Talking through key moments of TV shows/films/sports.

Probably about covers it.

Deveron Boy wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 2:08 pm

Hal Jordan wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 11:44 am Falling asleep in front if the telly at 9.30, yet somehow being unable to sleep if I have the light on past 11.00, cough, or move in the bed.

Seriously, she could fall asleep during the opening sequence of Saving Private Ryan but is has some kind of super senses, hypertuned to the slightest stimulation as soon as she gets into bed.

Hal Jordan wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 11:44 am Falling asleep in front if the telly at 9.30, yet somehow being unable to sleep if I have the light on past 11.00, cough, or move in the bed.

Seriously, she could fall asleep during the opening sequence of Saving Private Ryan but is has some kind of super senses, hypertuned to the slightest stimulation as soon as she gets into bed.

surely that's a positive?

Not when you move your leg half an inch and she huffs and has a go at you for your inconsiderate ways.

Constant stupid questions.

Driving down the road and she sees a guy with a lawnmower --- is he going to mow his lawns?

Get a message that Bill Smith just died. --- How did he die? When's the funeral? How is his wife?

See a car all dinged up on the side of the road. --- What happened?

How the fuck would I know!!!

PCPhil wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 3:50 pm Shouldn't this be "Stuff your missus does that doesn't drive you up the wall?"

Was half expecting Yeeb with "Stuff your missus does up against the wall" but we're probably safe.

Sandstorm wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 8:45 am

Margin__Walker wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 7:17 am
She's decent with money though tbf. Not tight, but doesn't fritter it away on useless stuff and is good with savings/investments.

+1 (bit of positive support for Salanya )

Cheers!

Happy to admit that I have a lot of shoes, which do find their way around the house.

Though my boyfriend is the one who can't organise dishes on the draining rack!

Brilliant cook, but makes a mess of every surface, utensil, cupboard , floor in the kitchen.

If she makes a mistake, immediately I get the blame for something I did (nt) say , do , made.

Can remember with absolute certainty things that I said 5, 10, 20 years ago (usually to back up her side of the argument)

Fantastic Mum & Granny , still has great norks , and can be ahem persuaded most nights.

lemonhead wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 9:02 pm

PCPhil wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 3:50 pm Shouldn't this be "Stuff your missus does that doesn't drive you up the wall?"

Was half expecting Yeeb with "Stuff your missus does up against the wall" but we're probably safe.

Anyone have a wife they can't fault?

Insane_Homer wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 10:08 am While watching a movie / TV series will ask questions about the plot as if I've already seen it

In 23 years together, still haven't watched a movie from beginning to end together without having to pause it several times to explain shit.

If it's a movie I want to watch, I wait until she goes to bed

My other half is an amazing woman, but...

She can be very chatty immediately on waking up. I am absolutely not a morning person, so this does my head in. Despite knowing that I can't function until I've had a cup of tea, she just can't help telling me about the weird dream she had, or whatever nonsense popped into her head during the night.

EnergiseR2 wrote: ↑Thu Aug 03, 2023 7:31 am

Hugo wrote: ↑Wed Aug 02, 2023 6:39 am Second is (acknowledgement to Yeeb who brought this up the other day) her propensity to constantly fritter money away on unecessary purchases.

Her money sense more or less revolves around a belief that if she has money then it HAS to be spent. Now, this would not annoy me so much if not for the fact that I think that my teenage daughter seems to developing the same habit.

Mine with money is probably fairly typical where the resources are pooled. She went back to college years ago and now works part time so thats the reason. Though I should note my salary goes into a joint account and hers goes into.her own. She calls that the bills account but I have noted it has her name on it and I can't make withdrawals. She does the family finances and very sensibly starts with the bills. Never have credit card debt or anything like that. All good so far. She then tells me she uses a proportion of her own money for savings only the only savings we appear to have are the ones I have made through back pay etc. So is hers running away money? That's cool but it's currently 'poof' disappeared. But I think the funniest bit is any expenditure that is not her own causes untold stress. She genuinely sees the remaining pot of cash as hers and the only reason she stays sane is I spend very little buy when I do the phone starts going. Of course we talk and I say ' you know I can spend cash money when I want. You do know that'. Her eyes always betray her

She's spending a fortune on new clothes (usually another black item almost identical to the last 4 she bought), but you're too self-involved to notice. This makes her really unhappy, so she keeps buying more clothes to try to cheer herself up. She's probably also got a credit card you don't know about.